i saw my parents last night for the first time in months, the first time since my father and i got into an ugly fight in august. i drove to tacoma after school, sucking on nicorette, stuck in holiday traffic. (the further south of seattle, the larger and more breeder-y the vehicles become. rattier, too. it makes me homesick.) my trepidation abated as we talked. it stayed fairly blithe- there was no delving into feelings, aspirations, regrets. thank fuck.
my mother went to a sleep clinic a month or so ago and was diagnosed with severe sleep apnea. she was monitored overnight and found to stop breathing around 20 times-at one point her SPO2 didn't register for "an hour." is that even possible? my parents, beers in hand, insisted it was so. "what about organ death?" i asked. "i wonder how many brain cells she's lost!" my dad said cheerily. "it would explain a lot." my mother laughed at that. i smiled politely (inwardly: dammit, be nice). apparently sleep apnea can lead to heart attack and stroke, both of which eventually killed my grandfather- her dad. they asked me if i snore. "i don't think so" i said. it is unclear if it's hereditary- my mother's condition is caused/exacerbated by "an overly large uvula". the most horrifying part: she now wears a mask to bed. it looks like a gas mask with a tube coming off the mouth. it wraps around the head and chin with a wide strap. she showed me pictures of her modelling it. "i call her snuffulupagus!" my father said.
they were both in good moods, which helped enormously. the thing with my folks: i adore them. they are wonderful people... except when they're not. my mother is pretty consistent in temperment (at least, more so than she used to be) but my father is not. have i been on edge, worrying about his mindset, my entire life? it would explain a lot. even if apnea isn't hereditary, neurosis certainly is. in any case, yesterday turned out better than i expected.
*
tiresias, about 10 minutes ago:

the christmas cactus is blooming. these guys are amazing. the flowers look like they're vomiting themselves new petals.

and it's thanksgiving in l'america. this was the amount of consumeristic shit that came with the morning paper. the hallmark of the united states: is it greed, blind optimism, banality, or all of the above?


i love working on holidays. it gives me a way to pretend i'm not sentimental.

aftermath

it was the best weekend i'd had in months. i had forgotten how it feels to laugh uncontrollably. i miss her too much to get terribly verbose. and i am very fucking fortunate to have such a brilliant friend.
in lieu of the hedonistic images that are currently up on, omg, facebook, some reminders as to why i live in a city that is fantastic in every way apart from having my best friend thousands of miles away...
fog, last week, drowning elliott bay. cars were lining the road to take photographs.

we drank the bottle of dom perignon that t bought for our divorce. the bottle has sat in my fridge, among the nail polish and ms meds, for over 2 years. it was tasty. he bought it for $140 on sale. we drank it on my 30th fucking birthday as the sun receded over capitol hill. the 'velvet goldmine' soundtrack played in the background.

mount rainier is an elusive beast. even when seemingly bombastic to the naked eye, it is nearly impossible to capture on film. this was the only one that turned out. we were back in west seattle en route to the airport.

...and the same skyline, same vantage point, as before. even out of focus, seattle is pretty enough to make me cry.

i have had insomnia today, awake since 430am. i saw the sun rise. the sky was magenta, then the sunshine poured in.

out of the black, into the blue

i cried whilst voting. and i went back after taking this picture to darken the ink even more.

as i left school on november 4th, this was the view. it was only 7pm EST. i went home, blared david bowie, and jumped on the trampoline.

a window on capitol hill that night:

and the lusty lady, november 5:

...later november 5, as i was going home, the bus i was on was sideswiped by a lexus SUV in the intersection of 3rd and battery. the driver of the vehicle took off on foot. the lexus was still running, windsheild wipers on. the 8 or so of us on the bus had to stay aboard until we could give our personal information. the police arrived with a tracking dog. when we were finally allowed to leave, the tow truck was just pulling up.

it has rained nearly 5 inches over the last 3 days... and all i can think about is how fucking wonderful everything smells. the world is shiny and new.

*snake in post*

this juxtaposition was so lurid that i had to do a u-turn. 'twas a beautiful day on aurora avenue.

jethro the corn snake. he can suck down 3 hopper mice in about four minutes. even my coworkers were appalled that i took this picture. "he's a pretty snake, though" one said politely.

last night at work a ~45kg lab presented with abdominal pain and a hisory of eating stupid shit. he was at the clinic one month prior for choking on a lamb bone. i will never, ever own a lab.
these were his radiographs:


an exploratory surgery recovered a 14" slab of rawhide, still in the stomach, fully intact apart from minor teeth marks at one end. and some grass. we were all mystified as to how that came to be. how does one swallow an unchewed, 14" solid object? and why? it was rather flexible, but still. the doctor had to fold it in half to pry it out of the gastrotomy incision.
here it is, post-op, with my hand for scale:

...we are being timed for school. i did my first full-body swedish-massage-in-an-hour yesterday... and then heard 'right here right now' on the radio.