i took d to hump 5, the stranger's annual amateur pornfest, as his graduation present. there was nothing that really titillated me this year (see: orgasm denial, 2008), but several were quite good. i voted for the lesbian and gay man, slothing around and complaining how horny they were, and reluctantly deciding to try each other out. it was fucking awesome. what else... a woman in a filthy cell peeing through her underwear into her hand, then having her clothes torn off my gravel-covered hands. that was slightly disturbing. watching an old (65+) man get whipped, shocked, and burned with a cigar... also slightly disturbing (although i didn't actually cringe until the cigar ember went on the inside of his lower lip and she ashed into his mouth). the FUCKING TRAFFIC CONE going up the woman's ass disturbed me. the long metal hook going up her ass, twisting, and then being accompanied by a huge penis REALLY disturbed me. the wire whisk being inserted into her hairless vagina, then twirled, was also unsettling, but i blame that more on her hairlessness (seeing the sagging lips of an adult twat is never right- it's akin to bringing a bat into a brightly lit aerie) than the implement. the more 'lighthearted' stuff- the two girls making out, innocently, was very hot. the rap about "MUH BIG DICK", accompanied by crude cartoons of mayor nickels, ballgagged and getting whipped. one adorable stoner boy from portland ejaculating in very public portlandian venues 10 times in 24 hours... interspersed of him making, then fucking, a sand-wench on the beach "'cause this is what happens when your girlfriend's in rehab.'"
d and i parted ways soon after. a man on the street told me i had nice eyes. and then i passed robyn fucking hitchcock on the corner of 1st and bell. i am going to his show tonight- so i will see if it was, in fact, him. we made eye contact, that smirky tension before the smiling calm. "holy shit, that was robyn fucking hitchcock!" i thought as i walked past. i wonder if he will recognize me obnoxiously taking pictures... i am still wearing my colorful, memorable scarf.
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4 days ago, lair, seattle washington. i am frizzy and sleepy and unwashed and forgot to unzoom after taking pictures of fucking plants or whatnot.
last night the internist was called in to remove a rock from a cat's trachea. we had taken radiographs to rule out asthma and- "patrick [the doctor], this cat's got a foreign body!" how the fuck does a cat suck a rock into its trachea? dogs, i can understand- dogs are incredibly stupid. but cats? his name was hugo. i monitored the anesthesia, which involved holding the cat's head upright and feeling him breathe against my arm and ignoring his cyanosis as the internist cursed and prodded with the bronchioscope. when it came out we all cheered. the cat's tongue and gums became pink immediately. "that's a $600 rock" the doctor said, dropping it onto the tray. he freaked out whilst waking up from the anesthesia. we had to give him midazolam so he would stop thrashing around in the cage.
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i have still never had general anesthesia. i plan to keep it that way as long as possible.
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when you're organizing a drawer, you're a 'drawerganizer.' i learned that last night at work. i laughed raucously. "brynn's the only one who'd appreciate that" someone said.
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