amongst the shit, something un-shit-like

it is so fucking nice to see s.
the weather is absolutely bombastic. she flew in under a full moon. the room at the hotel she is being put up at costs $300 a night. we drove by my lair. hecatomb flopped whorishly before her; tiresias circled close. it is surreal to show her my 'life' here. i feel comfortable, show-offy, self-deprecating, as if i am an actor in a play with a really cool set. this world still does not always feel like mine. perhaps it never will.
*
we lolled around her room talking until after 4 am. the topic of idiotic man-children came up. (do i even know any 'men'? have i ever?) i said something like "if i trust my instincts, i am horrified by the amount of creepy people in the world." "you should trust your instincts" she said. "a lot of peopleare really creepy."
this is one of the many reasons why i love her.
i am going to feel much lonelier when she leaves.